Saturday, March 29, 2008

Hit it!

Ten days ago, I set a goal of 1500 words a day for 14 days, which meant I would have 22,500 words by the end of those two weeks. With four days still left to go, I just hit 22,696 a few minutes ago. Hot damn, do I feel good. This after a dreadful word count yesterday of only 191 words!

I think I'll stop for the night and enjoy the rest of the day, all 16 minutes of it.

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Something's Working Right

So, over the past six days I have written close to 14,000 words and Jesus, does it feel good. The thing I'm working on now is just flowing. I set a goal for myself of reaching 22,500 words by the time I leave for Noircon next Thursday and I'm just 8500 words shy of reaching it. If I continue at the rate I'm going, which would be a miracle, I'll have over 32,000 words of a first draft.

I'm just waiting for life to throw something in my way. It's gonna come any minute now. Usually happens about the time I pick up speed on something. Any time now...

Friday, March 21, 2008

Progressive Attitude

You know those HBO "documentaries" that delve into human sexuality in the most superficial way, mainly as masturbation material thinly disguised as something educational? There's Real Sex and Cathouse - mainly for perverts too cheap to rent real porn. So anyway, I was watching an episode of Pornucopia, a wonderful series about the adult film industry that only shows the positive, happy side of porn (is there any other side?), and they were doing a lovely porn montage when they cut to a guy-on-guy blow job scene - just as I put a banana in my mouth! The shot lasts all of three seconds, but it just happens to come up as I wrap my lips around my phallic fruit. I'm watching this, feeling a weird kinship with the muscular dude on his knees, questioning why the most delicious fruit in the world has to be shaped like a dick. So, what do I do? I just shrugged my shoulders and ate the banana. Very progressive, indeed.

"Do you know how many foods are shaped like dicks? The best kind." - Jonah Hill, Superbad

Friday, March 14, 2008

You've Got to Watch The Wire

Admit it Wire fans, there are times when you kind of sound like this when you talk about your favorite show.

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

The Big Lebowski - The Whole Fucking Movie!

Dr. Laura Gives Great Head

That's the only conclusion I can think of after reading about Dr. Laura Schlessinger blaming the whole Eliot Spitzer prostitution scandal on Silda Spitzer, the governor's wife. The good doc said the Ho Lotta Love Gov wouldn't have strayed if his wife had satisfied him like he needed. "Hey honey, how about some unsafe sex? No? Well, I'm gonna take $4500 out of savings and send some text messages since you can't satisfy me. Don't wait up."

So, I figure that Mr. Dr. Laura must be the most satisfied guy in America. She must blow him for hours on a nightly basis while he watches reruns of The A-Team and Rockford Files and eats the nachos and chocolate chip cookies she made before he got home from work. Maybe the good doc should teach Silda Spitzer how to give good head. Problem solved. Maybe people would have let Spitzer keep his job if Silda announced her admittance to Blow Job Rehab - which, incidentally, is the most popular wing of the Betty Ford Center.

But didn't Spitzer have more than one ho on the payroll? Wouldn't the first whore be just as responsible as the wife? I mean, if the first could have satisfied him, he wouldn't need to go to other whores. I think I would have asked the Emperor's Club for my money back.

Sunday, March 09, 2008

Who References the Zenger Trial Anymore?

The latest edition of TIME Magazine has an opinion piece written by the majority of the writing staff of The Wire that criticizes our country's drug policy. Their disdain for the war on drugs is nothing new to those familiar with the show, in fact the essay acts as a sort of capstone remark for the entire series. What is new is their collective call for citizen action in response to the failures of our government, mostly in the form of jury nullification.

There aren't any politicians — Democrat or Republican — willing to speak truth on this. Instead, politicians compete to prove themselves more draconian than thou, to embrace America's most profound and enduring policy failure.

If asked to serve on a jury deliberating a violation of state or federal drug laws, we will vote to acquit, regardless of the evidence presented. Save for a prosecution in which acts of violence or intended violence are alleged, we will — to borrow Justice Harry Blackmun's manifesto against the death penalty — no longer tinker with the machinery of the drug war.

Of course, in order for the citizenry to have the chance to utilize their right of such protest these drug cases would have to reach a jury in the first place. Many do not. Most cases are plea bargained between overworked public defenders and statistics hungry prosecutors. Too bad.

NPR has an interview with Dennis Lehane about the opinion piece.


Thursday, March 06, 2008

Space Alone

Sometimes you find the perfect story that fits your mood. I found this today.

Saturday, March 01, 2008

Hardcore Hardboiled Trailer

Remember to buy like 6 or 7 or a dozen for all of your friends and family.